Mail-order
bride industry in Soviet Union is a hit with
British men
Men pay up to
£3,000 to visit several cities on 'Romance tours'
Told to
expect 'more beautiful women in 11 days than you meet in five years'
Involve
'socials' where 15 to 25 men will be introduced to 150 to 250 women
Men are often
double the age, or more, of the scantily clad women
Huge backlash
after pictures from 'socials' posted on blogs online
Many fear the
industry exploits vulnerable young women in bad situations
PUBLISHED: | UPDATED:
The ratio of women to men can be ten to one, or 'about as close to
paradise as you get,' according to a balding Home Counties civil servant on his
first visit to Ukraine
Welcome to the mail-order bride industry in
the old Soviet Union , aimed heavily at British
and American men who have failed to find love at home.
'A lot of the blokes here think we've died
and gone to heaven,' said the tubby 47 year old who works for a Home Office
agency as he eyed a gaggle of revealingly dressed young women who would not
have seemed out of place on a Parisian catwalk.
Typically men pay between £1,500 and £3,000 to visit several former
Soviet cities on tours which are 'designed so that all you have to concern
yourself with is meeting as many women as possible.'
Many of the scenes in our pictures are from
a 'Romance Tour' to the Ukrainian capital of Kiev
but such images are repeated across the old Soviet empire from Volgograd
And if Ukraine is known for its basket case
economy, the dating market - critics prefer the term 'cattle market' -
appears to be thriving, eased in part by far easier visa rules than to Russia,
and a number of other former states in the fallen USSR.
Yet as we will see, a strong
backlash is on the way after bloggers posted these and similar images online,
leading to readers posing such awkward questions as: 'What does it say about
our countries that our women are offered like this to such men, some of them
looking like degenerate grandfathers' and 'How can our women humiliate
themselves in such a way?'
The men are promised that, at 'Socials' as
in the pictures here, they will be in the company of 'sincere, young, beautiful
women who believe in family values'.
They are feverishly told to expect to meet
'more beautiful women in 11 days than you will in five years'.
At these occasions, typically some
15 to 25 men will be introduced to 150 to 250 women, often having to
communicate via an interpreter. Many of the men are often double the age, or
more, of the women.
To ease things along both sexes carry large
name tags on their lapels. The women are also numbered - 'like in a slave
market', as one blog comment put it.
'Our clients date up to five ladies per
day,' boasts the website of 'A Foreign Affair', which offers single Western men
tours to a number of locations including Russia
and Ukraine
'The Kiev Romance Tour offers you the unique
opportunity to visit one of the most historic cities in all of the former
Soviet Union, while at the same time meet thousands of beautiful Ukrainian
women,' it states.
'Our Kiev Romance Tours provide you with an
extremely effective means to meet as many women as possible so you can find
that special one.'
Often such tours include one or two other
cities as Western men scour eastern Europe for their perfect match. These can
be provincial cities where the standard of living is lower and, say critics,
'our women maybe more likely to fall for a foreigner, however unsuitable he may
be'.
As one site says about the backwater of Poltava
'Poltava
Beautiful Poltava women with their relaxed
an easy-going, smaller city attitude help to make our stay one of the most
enjoyable two days on any of our exciting single tours.'
The civil servant - like many on
such trips he is is keen on retaining his anonymity - told me: 'I've got a
failed marriage behind me and several subsequent relationships did not work
out.
'I want a traditional wife and a lot of the
other men out here with me say the same.
'At home, our women have been brought up to
be independent, live their own lives, and not care for their men in the way our
mothers used to.
'Well, that's fine but I want someone who is
a traditional housewife. If we have kids, she stays at home looking after them.
Is that so wrong?'
He was attracted
to pay for his tour by hearing that Russian and Ukrainian women 'are not
polluted by all this feminist stuff', he said, before continuing his search for
his dream woman.
This is a frequent theme by men at such events.
'I want an old-fashioned girl brought up in a strict
family,' admitted Jim DiGregorio, then 68, from Arizona
'She should come from a family where maybe
Papa was in charge so she's used to a man being in charge. I prefer to be
captain of my ship.'
His aim in signing up with another agency,
AnastasiaDate.com, was to find a woman as much as a third of his age and he had
flown halfway around the world because the women here are 'traditional and
sexy'. He is far from alone in such aims.
When one Russian blog posted pictures from such dating
sessions, hundreds of angry comments, many unprintable, poured in.
'She sold herself for Coca-Cola,'
said one.
'This is a parade of geriatrics,' said
another. 'What are these women doing with these old men?'
The web went into overdrive as the pictures
were reposted.
One comment from a woman called Nadia under
a picture of a large American man and a young, slim woman said: 'How much must
you like money to go with THAT?!'
A reply came back: 'Yes, and imagine him
getting undressed and letting his tummy go... sorry must stop, I need to
vomit.'
Another reply read: 'How desperate must our
country be to have its young and beautiful women leaving like that?'
'So sad. They are prostitutes, aren't they, this is what it is
really called.'
'Yes, but when you've got a choice of local
men abusing alcohol and beating their wives, not wanting to look after
children, not wanting to work... these girls will be better off with their
elderly foreigners'.
Galyna, 23, who has attended several such
sessions in Kiev
The format is quite demeaning - well-off men
from the West and poor Ukrainian and Russian girls. Loads more women than men.
'We were expected to parade for them, as
well as talk to them.'
At some sessions, the women pose in bikinis,
at others they walk balancing a weight on their heads seemingly to show off
their figures.
'Yes, I am looking for a foreign partner
because I want stability in my life. Here, domestic violence is bad, our men
drink themselves stupid, and the divorce rate is bad.
'I think I'm worth more than that. If it means an older partner from
abroad, who really wants to share his life, then I'm ready for this even though
it breaks my heart to leave my homeland.
'I can see other girls who are after money
from this by hooking a rich foreigner.
'As one told me: 'There's no fool like an
old fool. I'll grab what I can from him'.'
But marriage agency owner Tatiana Tasueva
from Moscow
One Russian agency has called for curbs on
such tours while a spokeswoman for Ukrainian women's rights group La Strada
said today: 'Such 'dating parties' are are a form of discrimination against
women and such things often lead to the prospering problems we are trying to
fight, namely domestic violence and the trafficking of women.
'When a woman has only limited chances of a
professional career, and is paid 30 per cent less then men, as is the case with
us, she is superficially attracted by offers to try and make a career out of
family life.'
She stressed: 'We can't call such 'parties'
a good thing. They often end with problems for women, who go to an unknown
country, not speaking the language, and knowing nothing about her rights.
'Taking part in such 'Socials'
is not necessarily a rational decision for a woman.
'Often they have lacked love and happiness
in their lives, and are happy to get any kind of male attention. Marriage
agencies often exploit this knowledge and prosper, creating a good platform for
women trafficking.'
Another expert at the group, Ekaterina
Cherepakha, director of social programmes, said: 'The desire of some women to
marry a foreigner and go to live in another country is very understandable.
'Some find their way to foreign bridegrooms
online, others turn to marriage agencies. Is it good or bad for Ukrainian
women? In certain circumstances it can be good.
'But the point is that such agencies and
websites may serve a different purpose as a cover for trade or trafficking in
women or their exploitation.
'Sometimes when a woman wants to go and live
abroad she has very little idea about the lifestyle in the country she goes to.
'Nor about her rights, or
getting residence permits, or what happens in a divorce or how to keep her
children after a marriage break-up.
'Potential brides do not even think about
possible difficulties and even dangers they can face.
'And recruiters often use all this. When
some agencies and recruiters promise she will meet and marry a wealthy man,
no-one checks his marital status, mental health, crime record and all the other
things.
'It can all end in violence.
'So when a woman seeks help from such
agencies she must seriously consider all the possible consequences and
especially the risks.'
Against this, the agencies named here claim
to be thoroughly respectable and to have had a high rate of success in their clients
forging long lasting relationships and marriage with women in Ukraine , Russia
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